Weekly news round-up - a regular feature spotlighting interesting stories from the week: ****
Scientists don’t know about Apollo, but evidence is growing that the priestesses, known as pythia, were ripped on hydrocarbon gases, especially ethylene, a sometime anesthetic which, taken in modest doses, can induce lively conversation of a somewhat incoherent nature.
“I don’t think Howell wants people bitching about how they can’t spend time on the road,” says one reporter. “He’s looking for 30-year-olds with no spouse and no children, people who can file from four datelines in five days. It’s the model of what a national correspondent was like when Howell was on the national staff.”
(Ehhh, I’m still under 30, but I got the rest of the qualifications … call me)
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An airline passenger who allegedly got up to go the bathroom less than 30 minutes before landing became the first person arrested under a new federal flight regulation adopted for the Olympics.
Richard Bizarro, 59, could get up to 20 years in prison on charges of interfering with a flight crew.
(Bizarro?! That somehow makes the story even more … well, bizarre …)
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On the eve of the Toy Fair last week, Hasbro gave a party at the company’s Chelsea showroom to celebrate the fiftieth anniversary of the birth of its first toy, Mr. Potato Head.
(Happy Birthday, Mr. P!>
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Ten resolutely celibate sharks at the National Sea Life Center are getting a blast of Barry White in hopes they’ll get in the mood for lurve.
(“We’ll know if they are likely to mate as the male chases the female and tries to bite her back and pectoral fins in the early stages of courtship …” Ah, sweet, sweet love …)
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”I wanthsssssFFFF!!” he says, stuttering. My robber. Stutters. If someone is stuttering, you don’t draw attention to it, right? You figure out what he wants. This is a very bad time for a communication problem, and it’s probably all my fault.
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Chocolate fries with your burger? Beginning in May, H.J. Heinz Co. will ship a new line of Ore-Ida frozen potato products called Funky Fries featuring five new shapes, colors and flavors, all intended to give kids even more say over their parents’ grocery store lists.
(Two great tastes that …uh, suck? … together …)